A window just popped up on my screen announcing the start of "Harana Kita" at our office's main lobby as part of HR's Valentines Day celebration. Curious of what would it be like, and curious of who would sing (though I have a clue, and this little wish, that it would be him), I took my break and went to the lobby. And as I have hoped for, there he was, strumming the guitar while singing, with this gay friend of mine beside him, holding a heart-shaped balloon and a bouquet of flowers. There were a few people. I didn't know what to do at that point since anyone could notice just anyone there. So I went outside, and after less than a minute went in again, and I still didn't have any clue on what to do next. And then and there, Ms. HR grabbed my hand, this gay friend handed me the balloons and dragged me to the chair next to him. And the rest was like magic. There I was, sitting next to him, just a foot away, clearly hearing that lovely voice that made my heart jumped out of place, feeling the butterflies in my stomach, while he absentmindedly sings "You and Me" by Lifehouse.
Though that song was not meant for me, though he didn't even give a damn if I was there, that was one of the most romantic minutes in my whole life. Yeah, one of my daydreams just finally came true. I forced myself not to show any emotions other than that hesitancy of being there beside him. And, oh my god, the photo. I held the flowers, smiled at the camera and immediately jumped right out of the chair after that and glanced at it. And, haha!, I wouldn't have known that he also smiled confidently at the camera if not because of that photo. I looked awkward and stiff. No, we don't look good together. Hahay...Also, it worries me that maybe our faces will soon be flashed constantly on our lobby tv, and I don't want those reactions of friends that knew about my crush on him. I hope not, that photo wasn't at all romantic. Mismatched, kumbaga. But anyway, I didn't wanna end the moment right away, so I stood there, glanced at his song list, without even reading anything there. The words were all blurred and the only letter that I could make out was letter B. Of course, it's too hard to read and at the same time control all those weird things that I felt. He glanced at me, while I pretended to read the list, and I could no longer remember if I said something. I didn't look at him, and didn't said a word to him because I couldn't come up with anything sensible to say. After that, I just went back in, and burst all those kilig feelings that I felt to my seatmate who happened to also know about him.
I can't come up with the right words to explain what I felt during that time. My hands were numb, my cheeks were hot, could've blushed if only I'm a mestiza, and that there seemed to have a lot of microorganisms crawling inside my whole body. I didn't take in calls right away, afraid that I won't be able to handle it, since I couldn't erase that smile on my face no matter how I tried to. That effect lasted even after I managed to finish a 20-minute call. And just after a few minutes, I saw him again, approaching my side of the station (agi lang), and even though I wanted to smile at him, this stupid head of mine bent down by impulse just not to meet his eyes (torpe). I find myself always relieving that moment, worried if I had done another silly thing during that time. It was also so hard to force myself not to curve my lips while riding home because all I thought about was that moment. I really couldn't wait to share that to my best friend, or to anyone, and to document that in my blog.
And here I am right now, forcing again not to smile while writing this, since my brother is just here with me. That moment happened in less than 10minutes, probably just about 5minutes. It was not that remarkable to Ms HR, nothing to my gay friend, nothing to the people at the lobby, nothing to the people I rode the jeep with, and more so, it was definitely nothing to him. But that was, for me, the greatest fairy tale ever told. Maybe Valentine days weren't that bad after all. If it's not Feb 14 today, maybe I would have no reason to write this crap right now.
I wouldn't have imagined that I will write an entry that is clearly classified under the Valentines Day's section today. This was nothing that I really expected. Well, I don't know. I won't be able to fill my blog with love stories. I don't have plenty of them. This may no longer have a sequel, maybe this is just an advertisement, a one-time deal. Pampalubag-loob sa mga katulad kong single. Hehe. But, still, thank God for that bit of heaven. This is indeed a command for Alt+3.
