Again and again...

2:12 PM 9/18/2011

Here it is again. I'm feeling this familiar feeling of sadness, emptiness and hurt. It's so sad when someone you like doesn't feel the way that you do. Worse is you have no one to share your feelings with because you don't want anybody else to know how ridiculous you are for feeling that way.

What's hard about being a girl is the risk of telling a guy that you like him. It's either he'll take advantage of that feeling or keep his distance from you. Either way is a losing battle. That's why I'd rather keep this feeling to myself and just treasure this friendship thingy that we have.

There's this certain girl who happened to be my officemate who's flirting with him and almost all their common friends know it. Okay, 1-0. Yeah, I'm jealous. And I don't wanna be. I don't want anybody else to know that I am.

Isn't it ironic when a lot of guys out there would be willing to be with you but that only person that you long be with is not one of them? Why do we always have to choose to love those people who can't love us back? Why does it have to be so hard?

To you, 

I like you. I really do. But I guess we can't be together because He wants you to be with someone more deserving than me. It's just so sad knowing that I don't fall that easily with just about anybody, and then you came, and I did, and that's it, nothing else follows. A bitter truth that we can never be together is just too unbearable. But well, I can manage. It's just that I've been on this road once, and I don't wanna go back again. It's just too tiresome. And yes, it's ruining my pride. But I guess I have to turn my back on you.

So long,

Me