September 22, 2011

Ahmm, okay. Please send this letter to him.

Hi,

Do you still remember when I first said that to you? I guess not. You won't have to ask me though. I've saved every conversation we had on Facebook since day2 (day1 seemed so awkward for me then). Just so I can read them over and over again. Surprised? Well, yeah. I guess I've always loved you even I before I met you. It's a cliche, I know. But that's for real.

How long have we been friends? Oh, it's been 9 months now. And I've secretly loved you for all this time. 9 months is not just simply 9 months. It's hard to keep it all inside. I don't fall that hard with just about anybody. I did once before. And that had been tragic. And I've never felt more certain that I've fallen once again.

Yet, I guess I have to travel that same road of rejection again. You haven't given any sign of interest in me. Well, you don't have to worry about it. I understand. I'm certain that Im not your type. It's okay. I can handle it. Anyway, I'm used to it. I'm just freaking tired of doing this. I usually ask myself, "Why can't I just fall for someone who feels the same way that I do? Why does it have to be someone who won't love me back? Why does it have to be you?"

I'm currently watching "A Crazy Little Thing Called Love". How I wish I could say those things that I wanna say to you as bravely as what Nam did.

I'm a hopeless romantic. As always. And I guess this is the bravest thing that I can do. I don't even know if I can do more than this. I'm the most coward girl when it comes to love. So this is my best. Sorry.

If you're thinking that it's you, yes, you're right. It's YOU. And I'm writing this coz I can no longer contain it. I don't expect anything from you. I just wanna say it. If I can't say it straight to you, atleast I was able to say it HERE - where I first saw your smile and kind eyes, where we first met and became friends. Thanks for the likes and comments and the PMs. I know they will no longer come when you read this. But that's okay. Either way is a lose-lose situation.

So long...